Catch up Day!

I smoked my last cigarette around 11:00-11:30 on October 19, 2022. I didn’t say anything until I had hit 30 hours without a cigarette, then I told Daughter and granddaughter. So, while I’m calling the 19th my quit date, I did smoke in the morning; for practical purposes, I’ve been using the 20th as the day to count down from. Everything I’ve read states the first week, starting from day three, are the hardest to get through. I’m going to say I agree with that, thus far.

My day two – the 21st – was rough, I was irritable, and my poor dogs took the brunt end of that. Various life crisis would pop up, major and minor, and if my jitters were very noticeable, Daughter would hand me her cigarette for a quick puff or two. I was going through my melon vape juice quite fast, my strawberry-lemonade vape was – and is – acting up, extremely hard to draw from, so quite frustrating to use. And all I could think of, was how much I wanted a cigarette. Daughter smokes non-menthol, hand-rolled cigarettes. The hit or two I’d take from her cigarette, made me feel sick to my stomach. I don’t need aversion therapy, I know cigarettes are bad for me and I no longer enjoyed the taste of my own brand, as I once use to.

My day three, yesterday – the 22nd – I broke, it was so rough. I bought a pack of cigarettes. I did not buy my preferred brand. I told the girl I was trying to quit but was having a rough day, so please give me a single pack of the cheapest brand of menthol, they sold. I’ve smoked Marlboro menthol for well over twenty years… she gave me a pack of Lucky Strike menthol. Just having the pack soothed my jitters – psychological effect – and I waited an additional hour before opening it. Honestly? They tasted like ass. But they were menthol and gave me that spurt of nicotine my body was fiending for. I smoked half a cigarette and tossed the last half away. Yes, I still have that nasty pack of cigarettes here, and there are 17 cigarettes left in the pack. I found I definitely preferred my vape over the cigarette – a real improvement and damn good thing – so still definitely vaping away.

So, today is my day four. I grabbed the pack of cigarettes after I took care of the dogs, and placed them, along with my ashtray, on top of the fridge. *shrugs* Out of sight, out of mind? I’ve used my vape twice this morning. I am thinking of a cigarette, to be perfectly honest, but the vape has satisfied that urge thus far. I’m enjoying my coffee and ready to play Clash of Clans… no jitters so far, so I am so outtie….